By: Tony Vouis of Amulet Tattoos, St Pete FL
Nobody will see this, because nobody follows me, but here it goes anyway
Just turning 21 has given me a different perspctive on life. I see how much has changed in the past 5 years. How much ive changed. Yet how things from the past tend to follow you. No matter how far you run, how much you hide. It always comes back around. Haunting. The second you think youre free, BAM!
Past scars dont heal with only time. it requires forgivness of yourself. to forgive the shit you put yourself through, the shit that you did to others.
But how are you supposed to heal your heart? How are you supposed to heal what someone else has done to you? how can you forget? especially when all you do is drive the same streets, see the same places day after day. But just changing routine and scene doesnt heal anything. it follows you. cant go anywhere without being reminded.
Everyone just wants to find happiness. whatever that may be. its different for everyone. for me, i believe true happiness is finding your other half. that one person you can look at and know you will spend the rest of your life with him/her and feel truly safe and loved. Of course, the first time you feel that way, it usually doesnt work out, and you get heartbroken. then there is a second, third, fourth, fifth, and so on. people search their whole lives for that one person. sometimes you go back to someone because the spark is still there and come to find out you were wrong yet again. Sometimes you get scared. Scared if it actually works out, how long will it work for? 10, 20, 30 years? what about after that? Spend 5 years with someone, truly believing this will work, and then 25 years later find out it was all a waste of time. then comes divorce. all divorce does is turn the childrens perspective on love and marriage into something morbid. makes it all the more scary to fall in love themselves, with the horrid prospect of it all being for nothing.
“ill love you for the rest of my life” but can you really say that? how can you know forsure? how many times have you said that before and been wrong? how can i know that when i go away, another girl wont be in your bed? i would never know…
this life is full of uncertainty and failure. but i dont want to fail. i dont want to be uncertain. but life is short so how much of a chance should you take? do you have to spend your whole life looking over your shoulder to make sure the people you thought you could trust dont fuck you over? or can you know that someday you will be able to relax and know that there will always be someone you can trust behind you? these are the questions that kill